A paradox and a half

"મને ઐરહોસ્ટેસ્સ બનવું છે ", (I want to become an air hostess when I grow up), Dharmishtha, tells me with sharp glittering eyes, at the national Dare to Care campaign- a joint initiative of UNICEF and the Delhi Daredevils, in partnership with the Marriot, Ahmedabad, held on 16th May, 2014. I puzzled her why? "Because Diddiiiiii, then I can fly in an Aer-oh-plane anytime I want", she replies in a gleefully ecstatic shout, with a peculiar stress on the last syllable of didi. Worried about past incidents of a major airline crisis in the country, I tried to nudge her further but she seemed pretty convinced that the only way she and her family could travel in a flight whenever they wanted, would be when she becomes an air hostess. I understood her fascination. A 16 year old dreaming of flying off to the skies. We've all been there. And when she hugged me later after the interview, I was convinced, that this bundle of joy would make the kindest of individual...

Like seriously. What is wrong with ammas  and achhas  all over? Why would I ever want to get married to a guy who doesn't even have enough balls to come up to me and tell me that he likes me. But instead, sends his mom, dad, brother, grandmother, dad's brother, dad's brother's wife and their sons lijju and jojji (typical Keralite nicknames.Some of us actually carry off those names on our C.Vs too. Swag!), their dog Sunderan (Yes, yes, why not?), to check if my Kundli is compatible with his Nakshatras . And neither am I marrying a goat, a tree, a pole, a handpump, a hen, a banana or Sunderan so that my groom doesn't die the next morning. I mean, Really? How fudged up is that? So, we mate and he dies the next morning? What are we? Bees? Ooh but wait, I forgot, according to my family, sex doesn't exist. Oh yeah! The whole nine month shit, that's just pure aashirwaad  and lots of nakshatras  aligning together to fire up my belly. (if ever so). Also, I lov...